Are You Willing To Be Insane?

I’m thinking about what makes me weary these days, and it is this: people rejecting ideas out of hand. I walked out of the room last night as my mother and sister were vigorously bashing Facebook. I would have stayed in the room if either of them had tried it (even for an instant) and were willing to share opinions based upon their experiences. I don’t doubt that many of you reading this share negative feelings about Facebook (but I’ll admit – I love it!). It’s not my job to sell Facebook, so I don’t.

However, it is my job to assist in planning and organizational development, and I am floored by the tenacious clinging to “what we know works.” If only I could see an equal and opposite force to the frustrations expressed about the state of the economy and the related workforce reductions. I keep mentioning the definition of insanity (doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results) and, ironically, that act in of itself has started to feel insane.

My clients know that I have been promoting increased synergy and accountability through online collaboration using tools like Google Groups and Basecamp. The results I have seen with this methodology has been stunning to say the least, but apparently the pain needs to be excruciating before most leaders will implement radical changes like this to their team and organizational practices.

But forget IMPLEMENTING radical change. How many of us will even ENTERTAIN creative new ideas? How many of us are willing to venture out of our comfort zone, even for a moment, even with no obligation to act upon the ideas that we discover?

My friend Dan Koffman recently launched http://www.koffmantopspin.com/, and as we exchanged emails about his new venture, I am reminded that he has been a longtime inspiration to me when it comes to new ideas and creativity. Dan is a non-stop source of initiatives that actually get implemented! One lifetime will not be enough for him to realize everything that is going on in his head! I told him I was busy getting organized, but I’m going to give him a call now. I’m wondering whether anyone else who reads this will dare to tap into his creativity. Or are we all content to be insane…

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

The notion of taking more than the traditional two week vacation began as a germ of an idea about twenty years ago when I learned that respected colleagues Marilyn and Herb Kindler reserved one week a month for activities outside their professions of psychology and consulting. Even though I tucked the idea away in the back of my mind, it was never completely off the radar as I found myself veering further and further away from the long days that I spent in the art studio during college.

After deciding that I would make it a reality, it was another three years before it actually happened, but this past July was the sixth consecutive year for me to “go underground” for thirty one days on a “creative sabbatical.” Translation: no watch, no shoes, no schedule, no commitments, no social interaction other than immediate family. Sounds impossible, but truth be told, it’s glorious. July is definitely the “yin” to the “yang” of what my “real life” has become, and it helps me to more clearly see my path to a more balanced existence and renews my commitment to make that kind of balance the norm.

This year had its own special challenges as I resisted the urge to stay plugged in via email, Facebook, Twitter and Google Groups. Days “just reading” were guilty pleasures, as were the inordinate amount of time I spent figuring out where and what to eat! I broke my “no travel” rule and made a quick trip to New York City with a dear friend and we managed to see four Broadway Shows in three days! I left my art table up, made journals and artist trading cards (ATCs), played with collage and rubber stamping, and didn’t have to clean up after myself each day.

For the curious, some of the high points of the month (from the ridiculous to the sublime):

• On Broadway: Billy Elliot, God of Carnage, Next to Normal, Blithe Spirit and a personalized backstage tour at Wicked!
• Two days at the Getty Center dining, reading, people-watching and soaking up the sun
• Truffle Burger at Umami Burger (8th & La Brea), Milk & Cookies shake at Coldstone, Truffle Popcorn at the Royalton Hotel, a perfect lunch at Momofuku in East Village, NYC
• Hanging with my son Steven and daughter-in-law Rajina at Rush Street
• With my sister Tina, taking my mom to see the Chinese Garden at The Huntington and enjoying afternoon tea
• Improving my trigger control under the guidance of my husband Dean
• Walking at UCLA and working out
• Figuring out a system for organizing my photos; playing with Picasa, Adobe Elements and Photoshop.com
• Departures, The Lookout, Revolutionary Road, Apollo 13, The Hurt Locker, The Hangover, Doubt
• Everything Ravaged, Everything Burned by Wells Tower
• Doing nothing
• Doing nothing
• Doing nothing

Communicating Wants & Needs: Defining Organizational Roles

I left something important off the list of learning how to be an adult: “communicating your wants and needs.” This is actually a BIGGY (is that an adult word?). And the potential payoff for organizations in terms of improved resource utilization when this communication happens leads me to spend a LOT of time assisting in the process of developing role descriptions. It’s not an easy job, but someone has to do it.

I’m sure most of my clients would prefer that the people they oversee just “know” what they are supposed to do. I acknowledge how painful it is to sit down and actually define what people should be doing and how they should be allocating their time. But unless you hire someone who a) has performed the exact same role in an exactly parallel organization (same size, structure, culture, market conditions, your doppelganger twin as their manager, etc.) or b) can read your mind, you’re out of luck. Defining, discussing and agreeing upon the role description is a non-negotiable. There’s no getting around it, especially during times like these when resources are stretched to the breaking point.

When Managers do not say what they want and need, here is what I see:

• Manager is frustrated because staff member is not performing as hoped/expected/needed.
  
• Staff member is frustrated because his/her work seems to be unappreciated.
  
• There always seems to be “too much to do” the stress level is constantly on the rise.
  
• Performance evaluations are difficult and tense.
  

Here’s the conversation that needs to happen; the questions that must be asked:

• What is the gameplan for the company?
• How does our department/function support the gameplan?
• What are the major areas and specific activities that each person in the department/function is responsible for? What is the most effective way for each individual to allocate his/her time?
• Are the roles realistic given the market conditions and available resources?
  

And here’s where we get to the part about communicating wants and needs:

• What does the Manager want more of, less of, different with respect to the productivity and performance of the Staff member?
• What does the Staff member want/need with respect to direction, resources (time, money, supplies, equipment), skills (i.e. training)?
  

If you only have these conversations during the performance evaluation process, that’s not enough! If you are not perfectly aligned in the responses to these questions, there is work that needs to be done if you are to survive these challenging times!

Finding My Keys

At the beginning of the year I had a tremendous creative burst: I started this blog, increased my social networking, went wild with my hobbies, took a writing class, started to integrate technology into my practice in different way. I was moving in a hundred different directions. And then I lost my keys.

My husband said "don't worry - you never lose ANYTHING!". But I do worry. I worry that with my life so full, if I don't pay attention to a few crucial rituals, it could all fall apart.

I'm talking about rituals like ALWAYS putting my keys in the iron bowl on the table opposite the front door. If I take them upstairs to my office and put them down "for just a minute" I risk that I won't remember where they are as I fly through the myriad tasks and activities that fill my day.

I've come to believe that amid all of our choices and obligations each day, there are a few rituals that we all need to maintain in order to avoid total chaos. And that is oh so true in the workplace.

How and where we file information. Time to prepare and time to process. Rules about follow-up. What are the things that we absolutely, positively ALWAYS do so we can stay on track? So we can ALWAYS find our keys.

RESPECT

I couldn't help but hear R-E-S-P-E-C-T in my head as Aretha was belting out our national anthem at yesterday's inauguration. What a brilliant choice.

And then this morning on NPR, I listened to commentary on the moment at which Chief Justice Roberts misplaced the word "faithfully" while administering the Presidential Oath of Office. Obama hesitated, and then recited according to how he was prompted rather than according to how the oath is actually written. The reporter interpreted this as an act of respect, and reminded the listeners that Obama had not supported the Chief Justice's nomination.

I am marvelling that this moment was noticed. And was reflected upon in the media. What an opportunity to think about respect. And courtesy. Just when I was lamenting the lack of role models.

There is a wide range of opinions about the incoming administration. But we now have an opportunity to study a model for behavior. A model that was thoughtfully crafted during the election. A model that continues to reflect the seriousness of what it means to be a leader. A model that holds joy in the heart, but resists the opportunity to use "winning" as an opportunity to strut and taunt those with a different view of the world.

Let us enter a new age of respect. R-E-S-P-E-C-T!!!! That's what I call being an adult!

Learning How To Be An Adult

Reflecting on my work with individuals, groups and organizations, most challenges that I encounter seem to revolve around what I characterize as learning how to be an “adult.” For me, being an adult includes, but is not limited to, the following:

- Being aware of our own behavior
- Making conscious choices about how we behave
- Learning to control our impulses
- Being honest
- Honoring commitments
- Continuing to learn
- Assisting others to continue to learn
- Treating others with respect
- Giving others the benefit of the doubt
- Sharing information
- Understanding that nobody is perfect

Where are we supposed to have learned these things? From our parents? In school? From our employers? In an ideal world, all of these could and should be sources for our development into adulthood. But the reality is that for most of us, our parents, teachers and employers are/were mere mortals. And this means that some of our ideas about how to be a parent, teacher, employer (and husband, wife, son, daughter, friend, etc. etc. etc.) grew largely from our observation of less than perfect role models.

If we choose to support the mission of our organizations by being effective leaders, we need to understand how our behaviors can make or break that mission. What is the effect on the organization when we:

- Think only of ourselves
- Lack awareness of how we affect others
- Do not follow through on our commitments
- Do not treat others with respect
- Control through intimidation
- Do not provide the necessary information and resources
- Expect only perfection from ourselves and others

We need to understand how we behave. We need to understand our choices for behaving differently. We need to make choices.